Beautifully Me and Sober

Good evening fellow members on the path to a beautiful you! Along my journey I have hit a few bumps, minor setbacks, and self doubt, but I am happy to say that I sit here before you now filled with hope and spending each day with more of it than I have had in a long time. I am definitely starting to see a change in myself and my relationship with my husband. More of my days are spent care free and joking. Don't get me wrong, I still have bad days that I crave my old life and I want to rip, tear, and break everything and everyone in my path for absolutely no reason. But, those days are starting to become fewer and far between. My work life has been slightly hectic and I have been working on a new endeavor or two so I have been remiss in my posts but I am ready to clue you in for the newest adventure into...duh duh duh duuuuuhhhh! ADULTHOOD!! *Superhero cape flaps in the wind*. Okay, okay I'm no superhero but I had to make sure you were still awake. The key to getting start...

When you were a kid did the vision of yourself as an adult change as often as mine? I would make up these wild fantastical visions of my self as a ballerina, an actress, an astronaut, a teacher, and even a checkout lady at a grocery store. It's safe to say that I had a pretty vivid imagination, but we all do as humans. I still do that. I close my eyes and I picture who I could be and what I want to be. My sister calls it me putting on different hats. Each hat represents me trying on different identities (i.e. poet, rocker, athlete, prep, girly girl). That being said, as I type this blog one handed with my left hand, I am no athlete.  My latest adult venture is diving into athleticism. I have been going to the gym every morning since the start of this week. I bought the right outfit, had the perfect water bottle, and even woke up ready to get in shape. Knowing myself well enough, I decided to take the classes provided at the gym. I don't have the gumption, experience, or know...

Some times when I'm working toward this goal I feel like being an adult is an IMPOSSIBLE task. In my beautiful shiny image of adultiness, I see myself wearing a light pink blouse with a perfect bun, a folded bandanna headband, smiling like the sun is always shining on my face. Let's come back from my personal "La La Land". I know and you know this image is unreasonable and improbable. First of all I will most likely change my hair and outfits a million times in the next ten years alone. Secondly, there is no perma-sun that will follow me around indoors and outdoors. The point of this person I see, as myself, is to remind me what I'm working toward. The underlying metaphor is happiness, peace, and no unneeded stimuli. I know that my path won't be easy, I get this, but I need some clarity. This weekend I got into a knock down, drag out fight over a pair of light blue shorts.  I'm not entirely sure if it was because the situation was so ridiculous or if it ...

       Roses are read violets are blue, sugar is sweet, except when you're trying to rhyme with sweet and the only word that comes to mind is beet. Good evening! When I first started this blog I knew, deep down, that I wasn't going to love every activity that I tried. Unfortunately this would be the second that I have begun in the last couple days and am less than enthused with. Don't get me wrong, I love to write, especially if it's from the heart and involves my own experiences. If you follow along with me and do each activity keeping your own journal, then you will find that you may love some things and some you may not have any interest in at all. Think of this as finding your niche or discovering "you" again. When you spend a lot of time focusing on the wrong things you forget the little things you once knew about yourself.           So today I became something of a poet again. Funny enough I had forgotten how to write even the s...

Let me start my 22nd day by saying that this post might have been titled differently today. Among the list of new things I was trying to do, involving games of the past was definitely not one of my finer moments. Nevertheless, I write today to let you know so perhaps you can avoid my mistake.  Yesterday was New Year's Eve. Happy New Year! For those of you starting a day one this day, good on you for trying or maybe for changing after seeing your reflection. Everyday won't be a victory and, regardless of the new year, everyday is a new day and a perfect opportunity to start over. I had the option to spend New Year's Eve with my family. A calm relaxing night where we would do puzzles, play games, and have sparkling grape juice at midnight. No hope of alcohol arriving at the scene. I fully intended on going. A moment of weakness prevailed and I offered the holiday time choice to my husband, full well knowing the choice he'd make for both of us.  My husband chose to spe...