Beautifully Me and Sober

Before you freak out and ask yourself, "Why did she put family in quotes?!" Dun, dun.....Duuuuuuunnn!, and come up with a million theories as to the purpose behind it; I'll start by explaining. Everyone in this world has a good family or can have access to a good family. Family isn't always defined by blood relation. When you read this blog entry and think of your family, I want you to think of the people who support you the most. The people that you go to when your world is falling apart, again, and they take your tears and your mess and they help you scrub away all of the cobwebs that seem to have a hold on your clear mindset. The people who take you back into their arms a million times when you've messed up and they still love you and they still want to be a part of your life. I'm talking about those people. Those are my family. If you don't have people like this in your life yet, please don't give up, it took me 28 years to discover these people in...

You know those memes about basic women with their one dish of Fettuccine Alfredo? Well....that's me. I lure men in with my feminine wiles and one signature dish of Fettuccine Alfredo. By the time they realize I can only cook five things and am not as chill as I pretend to be, they're hooked. Now that I have the title "wife" I feel like this is a HUGE part of my millennial life that needs to be more adulty. I need more than 5 dishes to feel like I've earned this title. So I called my mommy to render aid. You may remember her as the woman who walks into the room and a hundred angel choruses sing because she's the picturesque view of everything perfect. Yes, I called in... the BIG GUNS. There are three recipes I've been able to learn in the past couple of weeks. Baking was the main priority as I love to bake but I want to venture past cake and brownie mixes from boxes. I've baked banana bread, coffee cake, and Oreo balls. All three have turned out reall...

Let me start this entry by saying a hard and fast truth about myself. I am a huge, beyond abnormal, weenie. When it comes to animals, people, or even inanimate objects I am completely hypersensitive. So when I tell you that I tried fishing and shooting guns please understand it was catch and release and I fired guns at targets in a shooting range. Yes!! I went fishing! So let me level with you about this hobby. I used worms and that was...interesting. Putting them on the hook was hard. Worms are squishy and change shape so easy and a small part of me was terrified they would slip into my nail bed and kill me. Okay... I'm being deeply dramatic! But, it was so hard to put them on the hook and not do a shuffling dance every time. I even tried giving the worms a pep talk like, "Okay, I know this isn't fun and I'm really sorry about this but we can do this. NOOOO!! Don't do that (as they wriggle from my hand). You're not being a team player right now Mr. Worm....